The Epilogue: A Baldrick Moment

So, while Sheila and Richard were off to the airport, Ian and I were tracking down the local Nissan dealer and relieving him of a radiator. Richard had taken the old one off – I just had to fit the new one. Five minutes for a competent mechanic, so 45 minutes for me.

Finally said goodbye to Doha around noon, and an hour or so later I was in the Magic Kingdom, missing the entrance to the first petrol station because a truck was parked across it. No problem, I thought, there will be another.

There wasn’t. The fuel light came on and Udaid was just within reach, 15km away. Udaid? Must be a village, probably camels, a mosque, perhaps a few shops and certainly a petrol station. Wrong. There’s a quarry, and bugger-all else. Now it’s 45km to the border (and the next known fuel) and I have about a teacupful left in the tank. What to do? Press on and pray, and possibly end up empty and immobile? No, there was a better way. The words ‘cunning’ and ‘plan’ hovered, unspoken, in the balmy afternoon breeze.

Park it at the side of the road. Somewhere flat and not too squidgy (rain having fallen there also). Swap the cars round, and problem solved. Sounds like another five-minute job when you say it quickly. Unlash the Beast, tilt the trailer deck, drive it off, drop the jockey wheel, move the road car, swap the ball hitch onto the race car, play car chess, manhandle the reluctant Beast into precise position (without, dear reader, the benefit of power steering or a spotter), load up the road car, lash it down…..so that’ll be another 45 minutes, then. But we’re good to go, and the Beast is more than half full.

Two minutes and 3km later we reach a petrol station, fuel up the road car and do the whole rigmarole again. I could have spat.

Truly, a plan worthy of Baldrick himself.

What a result!

We're at the back of the pack, second to last, with an 0820hrs kick-off time. The weather is overcast and I'm not feeling optimistic. But heigh-ho, we'll give it our best shot.

First we have to get the Beast out of Parc Ferme, then we have 10 minutes for service. I forgot to mention that we'd had to remove the lockwire from the restictor last night (under the supervision of Lionel Carre, Technical Delegate of the FIA), and the first job this morning was for Richard to re-do this, within the 10 minutes. And then clean the windscreeen...

The waiting is of course the worst bit. And there's plenty of that, before you're on the start line. Then...how can I describe it? Your heart rate has already peaked, and once you're moving it gets back to normal. Almost.

We only have the roadbook, the Terratrip, and the waypoint for the next PC. Once we've lost the way, the only option is to straight-line it to the next PC. Which means crossing stone-fields at idling speed, which isn't a lot of fun. But we kept on finding the PCs, collecting their stamps, and ended up at after 240km at the service point, followed by an Emirati who had no nav equipment. Stage 3 started off in the same vein - we were lost, and had to endure the rigours of the stone-fields once more. Then we got into the sands around the Inland Sea - no easier for navigation, but more fun to drive.

Eventually, we're at the finish! We get into Parc Ferme for the last time and there are only seven cars there - how did that happen? Some of the haven't got a full set of PC stanps. Surely we must get penalised for our cross-country excursions, but it seems everyone else had the same problems. But where's Richard?

3km after leaving service, the radiator on the road car (which I'd just driven 650km from Dubai) split. Oh, and it's now raining. And he's 125km away from the bivouac. But by now, Ian Cooper is at Sealine with his trusty steed, a rented Pajero. So, leaving Sheila at Sealine, we head off through the gathering gloom and intensifying rain to rescue Richard. By the time we arrive, he's fixed the split rad with epoxy and we have enough water to re-fill it. Our joy is however shortlived - the split re-opens and Ian ends up towing the stricken road car back to Doha on the trailer. (Rented cars are, of course, eminently suited for such abuse.)

However, our mood is lightened by news from Sealine. Sheila, my trusty co-driver, has just driven the race car over the ceremonial ramp into (wait for it) 5th place!Mabbsy is an unbelievable 2nd, and Mark is 4th in the Buggy. Somehow, the penalties for our late arrival at Parc Ferme have disappeared, and our off-course excursions have resulted in a penalty of a mere 2hrs 15mins - but only three finishers had fewer penalties.

Sheila somehow manages to drive the steering-challenged Beast back to Doha, and the evening chez Ian and Maxine dissolves into an alcoholic haze of mutual congratulation. It's been, as Streaky would say, emotional. What a result!

Qatar Prologue

Bit of a disaster really! Halfway round the return line of the power steering blew off and we lost all the power steer fluid. Then the isolator popped out and we stopped on the track...aaaargh! Gareth towed us off, I found what had happened, reset the isolator and drove back onto the track through the marker fence, which was a 6km length of string on rebar posts. So then we were wrapped up in rebar and string, can this get any worse?

Well we finished and set about finding a new piece of 3/8" hose (got any 'ose?), but that isn't the problem, just the symptom. The p/s box has packed up which is why the return line is getting pressurised. So we've vented the cap to take the pressure off, and half-filled the reservoir so it doesn't splash round too much. All this has cost us a shedload of penalties because we should have been in Parc Ferme whan we were trying to fix the car.

But hey, we're still in it, let's see if we can get round. I'll have arm muscles like Charles Atlas by the time I've doen 340km without power steering! Wish us luck - looks like we'll need it!

Greetings from Doha!

Finally, plan B came good. Thanks to Ravi (who has connections there) the passport escaped from the Saudi Embassy on Tuesday evening, and Wednesday morning at 0815hrs I was on my way with the race car on the trailer. Had a close shave at the Abu Dhabi border when they demanded a Certificate of Tourism for the race car – I’d only got one for the road car. But they relented and by 1330hrs I was in Saudi, and 125km later I was exiting Saudi for Qatar. At 1530hrs, 100m from the Qatar Motorsports Federation (QMMF) office, a taxi overtook me, with some familiar faces waving. Unbelievably, Sheila and Richard had managed to arrive by plane and taxi at the exact same time as me!

Major thanks are due to Ian and Maxine Cooper, who have kindly put the three of us up for the duration, conveniently close to QMMF. Ian will join Richard at Sealine on Saturday for the main event.

Documentation is sorted, the car passed scrutineering this morning with flying colours, and tomorrow we need to be at Parc Ferme in Sealine before noon, for a prologue starting at 1300hrs.

Richard has been busy tidying and tightening various things, and we’ve picked up a few points which need attention before our next outing. But the Beast seems in good fettle, we’ve done all we can so let’s see what tomorrow brings.

Best Laid Plans...

Just when we thought it was sorted, a bureaucratic problem rears its ugly head.
My residence visa expires in the middle of December, and according to the Saudi Embassy rules, they need a month of validity to issue a transit visa. Now with a bit of luck they might not spot it, but knowing them, they will.

But, as the great Baldrick would say, I have a cunning plan. I think this would be Plan C. This is to get Richard a transit visa, and let him drive my car, while I fly to Doha. There is bijou snagette in this, which is persuading the Saudi Emb that he has my permission to drive my car, but surely that must be solvable.

Watch this space for the next exciting episode in the Qatar Baja Saga...

Revenge of the Spider

It’s been a while, but there is much to report. The car came back from A2B with the refurbished shocks and shiny front and rear bumpers, and went straight into Skyline for the exhaust system to be repaired. They have replaced the broken Y-section and the silencer box, and added a flexible section as well.
From there it went into Saluki Motorsport, for stainless steel top and bottom radiator hoses, and a revamp of the intake system which was seemingly letting dust through the filter. The new system includes a complete new air-cleaner box, leading to a long section of 3” aluminium pipe which exits towards the bulkhead, through a new restrictor (36mm for 2012), over the back of the engine, and then forwards to connect with the plenum at the front. This circuitous route gives us additional post-restrictor air volume, which is a Good Thing.
Then Rick at Saluki found various other things, which had either not been completed or not noticed before. The fuse and relay boxes weren’t anchored to the new inner wing, the compressor wasn’t working, two bolts were missing from one engine mount, and there was a nasty noise coming from the thrust bearing of the clutch.
Now, those of you who have been paying attention will recall that last year we replaced the clutch, thrust bearing and the adaptor plate, because its integral spider (which supports the thrust bearing) had fractured. Well, guess what – it’s déjà vu all over again. Thrust bearing has seized due to dust ingress, and the spider is broken.
The whole thing came from Marks 4x4 in Oz. It’s cast in aluminium, which is fine for the adaptor plate, but not so clever for the spider. The casting is horribly porous and brittle, and clearly not man enough for the job. So Robbie, Saluki’s brilliant fabricator, has managed somehow to weld it back together, and four additional steel legs will be bolted to the adaptor and welded to a new steel ring which will support the new bearing. It’s not the most elegant solution, but should hold together until we can fabricate a complete new all-steel spider. All of this should be complete tomorrow (Sunday).
Plan A had been to send the race car by car transporter to Doha, and fly down to meet it. Unfortunately, we couldn’t get the minimum 6 cars to make this viable, so we have reverted to Plan B – trailer the race car to Doha. The trailer now has four new boots, and a new jockey wheel assembly to replace the one which got twatted some time ago. I’m in the process of getting a transit visa for Saudi Arabia, which inconveniently lies between the UAE and Qatar. Leaving Wednesday (23rd) morning, I should be there by evening, while Sheila and Richard will fly, getting there in time to complete documentation. We’ll only need to sticker the car before scrutineering on Thursday.
It’s all ended up being another last-minute panic, but assuming the Saudi Embassy and Saluki Motorsport do ‘the needful’, we’ll be racing next weekend.