Some like it hot. And muddy.

Lights, camera, "Action"

It's that time of year again, when all hell breaks loose in The Empty Quarter, Ian and Sheila go off in search of glory, Rick and Kate go off in search of paradise, Jason goes in search of his birthday presents but ends up in the desert anyway, and Phil asks himself what the hell he was thinking. Yes, it's DC time! Nothing to do with David Coulthard, other than a bit of stubble and a crash helmet, it's the other DC, you know the one - "Damaged Car". But I'm getting ahead of myself, which, given how slow I am, is not very difficult.

The Beast's behind.

Yes 'tis I, the Phantom of the Blogger, soon to be the subject of a terminally dull musical by Andrew Webbed Feet and starring Sarah Brightspark for no other reason than she's ever present in his worst musicals. i.e. all of them. She'll be wearing half a mask, which is a shame because it's Mr. Webbed Feet who should probably wear the mask. But anyway, I digest.

Those of you who were expecting me yesterday probably forgot to reset your clocks last weekend. Either that or I must apologise; "If there weren't no bloggin', it's 'cos I couldn't log in". For some reason (probably my age and decrepit brain cells weakened due to excessive consumption of Cabernet Shiraz grapes as a food source. I thought "5 a day" was a glasses of wine requirement) I was unable to access Mr. Barker's secret code and sign into the blog, so I swore. Today however, using, I swear, the exact same passwords, "I got in". Hurrah - no more swearing.

"No wheels!". Give me wings....

"Prologues" I hear you say and yes, there was one. Now for the purposes of this post, I'm going to pretend that today was yesterday, so here is 'today's' report from the prologue........."Not as muddy as last year, otherwise exactly the same". i.e. rather like 2015's, but a lot less dusty. The cars went round and round, the bikes went round and round, local hero AND 2017 DAKAR WINNER Sam Sunderland won the prologue in front of an adoring home crowd (at least three of his mates were there) Nasser Al Attiyeh did as Nasser always does and won the prologue in the Autos, and Ian and Sheila sauntered round in a sauntery fashion, which is like Primark fashion but MUCH more expensive - because racing cars cost more than racy cardigans. Do Primark even sell racy cardigans? Sexy sweaters? Pullover Provocateurs? Maybe not. But anyway, I divest.

Muddy car, jet wash, generator.
Just add water. 250 litres of water.

A veritable plethora of horsepower and automotive engineering was on hand to support In'she'la including a Patrol, a Raptor, a three tonne truck and a sexy six tonne truck. The Patrol is Ian's, the Raptor is Ian's, the three tonner is Ian's (OK it's Al Thika's) and the sexy six tonner complete with 250 litre water tank, is Tim's Travel Truck, and it rocks. Doubling up as a temporary fire engine, Tim brought his mobile water supply so the Beast could have a wash after the race. So once Ian was clean, Rick then used the jet wash and cleaned the race truck too. Much mud was removed and then we walked in looking like dynamite with our Tiger Feet. Sorry - too much Mud? The Sweet were better anyway.

Georgy Gomshiashvili (who wins today's blog award for the most difficult name to spell correctly first time) who races in the EDC with his Saluki built buggy, was so impressed by the team's car wash facility that he asked if he could bring his along too. For a moment the Newtrix team were hesitant but then Georgy said the magic word - "Beer" - and was immediately welcomed with open arms.

Ian and Sheila finished the prologue in 24th place, making a mockery of their 25th place seeding. Mind you with the rain we've been having lately, most seeds are doing better than expected this season. Tomorrow is another day (no it's not, see the 4th paragraph) and it's off to the desert we go. Tonight (last night) however there will be much quenching of thirsts. Damn it was hot out there (yes(today).

Summer Update

Summer is not the time for rallying.  It is the time for repairing, upgrading, and regrouping, which tends to make uninteresting reading.  However, there have been a couple of highlights.

 

30^th April was the annual awards dinner for EMSF, and marshals’ party.  I received the winner's trophy for theT1 Championship for the 2^nd year running, which is very nice, as well as one for 2^nd place in the team awards.  Much alcohol was consumed, I seem to recall.  And there’s a video compilation of the 2014-15 Championship here.

 

6^th May saw Newtrix on set at a desert video shoot for a commercial.  Mobily, the Saudi Telco, sponsor Yazeed Al Rajhi, the well-known rally driver, and the storyline needed a second rally car and driver – which was me.  It was one of those rare occasions when the Beast actually earns money, and as such I seized it with both hands.  But bloody hell, it was hot, and a worse day to be wrapped in a rally duvet in the middle of the desert would be hard to imagine.  But the crew got the shots they needed, I ended up towing Yazeed’s Robby Gordon Hummer out of the desert, and I got paid.  Hurrah.  Of course, to get to this point we really needed some power steering, which (if you’ve been following the plot) you’ll recall was notably absent in Ras Al Khaimah.   So finally, Mebar got to fit the GM power steering pump (which Kate and Rick travelled about 800km to fetch).

The Ras Al Khaimah Rally video is now on YouTube, and it does contain glimpses of the Beast – as well as Sheila getting her trophy!

We happened to be in Spain in July while the Baja Aragon was on, so we headed up to Teruel to spectate.  What a brilliant event!  Some 200 competitors (bikes, quads, cars, trucks) and crowds of spectators at every viewpoint.  Our main focus was our mate Emil Kneisser in his Y62 Patrol, who is currently lying 2^nd in T2 in the Cross Country World Championships.  He ended up 3^rd in Spain, but we also got to see Harry Hunt (who we’d previously met at Goodwood), Marek Dobrowski, Khalid Al Qassimi, Nani Roma (who won), Denis Berezhovkiy, and Nasser Al Attiyeh (who DNF’d).  Great event, and great atmosphere.

 

A certain amount of fettling has been done, and more is in process.   I replaced  a smashed headlight and bodged together the damaged front wing (a legacy of the ADDC), with a rather excellent adhesive called Weicon Fast-Bond.  I fitted a heatshield for the clutch cylinder, and new high-temperature ceramic coated spark plug leads are awaiting fitment.  Nanjgel have been tasked with overhauling the front axle and brakes, and finding out why the starter doesn’t always start. 

Both of the Monit rally tripmeters have been misbehaving, and I finally traced the problem.  Monit used a surface mounted socket for a short time, before realizing that this was a Bad Idea and reverting to the pin-type mounting.  And of course, the law of Sod dictates that mine have the unreliable surface mounted ones.  Well, actually Monit have them at the moment, and will hopefully either fix or replace them - watch this space.

But the Big Job is re-wiring the Beast.  I’ve taken the plunge – egged on by Jason – and ordered a Painless Performance wiring loom, which he reckons will take us two weekends to install.  The wiring is a mess, and getting it right will give us reliability and traceability, because all the wires are pre-printed with their function.  A second (scratch-built) loom will supply all the various in-dash electrics for tripmeters, GPS etc.

 

Apart from that, I have completed the documentation now required by ATCUAE for all race cars, and the Beast has the sticker to prove it. Hurrah again.

 

We have a calendar of EMSF rallies for the coming season, and dates for the EMC events till the end of the year – as follows. 

EMC: Emirates Motorsport Club

EDC: Emirates Desert Championship (EMSF)

2-3 October:       R4 EMC (Night Rally)

9 October:           R1 EDC

23 October:        R2 EDC

13 November:   R3 EDC

20-21 November: Dubai Int’l Rally (R5 EMC)

11-12 December: R6 EMC (Fujairah)

29 January:         EDC Single Day Rally

12 February:       R4 EDC

4 March:              R5 EDC

So October will be a busy month – watch this space!