Darlings of the Media

After having done precisely zero PR for the rally, we got a phone call from the nice man at Sport 360, our local sports daily. After a telephone interview at the weekend, a photographer duly arrived on Sunday afternoon to take some pictures of us and The Beast. We had to dress up in our rally gear and mime some fairly unconvincing rallying around Arabian Ranches, and allegedly this will result in our appearance in a pull-out DC supplement on Wednesday. Watch this space.

Today, German TV approached us to do a special on the only husband-and-wife team in the DC. They plan to do three video sessions, one pre-start, one at the start and another at the finish. This all sounds rather exciting, although I did have to promise to abstain from John Cleese impressions and avoid any mention of the 1966 World Cup for the duration of the event. When this 30-minute feature might air is as yet unknown, but we have been promised a copy of the finished piece.

Meanwhile, in a related development, Richard Bailey’s boss reneged on his promise to allow him time off for the DC and sent him to Norway instead (boo, hiss!). This is as much a blow for him as it is for us. However, under the pretext of recruiting for our Abu Dhabi F1 marshalling team, we met up with Ian Simpson. I promised him a week filled with adventure, excitement, travel to faraway places with strange-sounding names, and all the sand he could eat. He was easily seduced by my persuasive lies, and in a moment of madness signed up for a week of unspeakable hardship in the service of NewTrix Racing. So we now have a man whose CV highlights include ‘knowing one end of a spanner from the other’ and ‘being very good with tiewraps’. We’re going to try and build on this, and if he shows promise, we’ll introduce him to gaffer tape and binding wire. He will be driving the heavily laden VW Transporter from bivvy to Service Point and back every day, an essential if unglamorous role, and we extend the warm and sweaty hand of welcome to our new team member.

On the car front, we eagerly await the arrival of a heavy-duty sway-bar from Australia, having bent two standard ones into interesting banana shapes in the past. Our new rattle gun has arrived, to replace the old one. This has sadly endured greatly in the service of NewTrix, being run into by the dastardly French (boo, hiss!) and then destroying itself in an ultimately futile bid for freedom from its captivity in the back of the race car. I have managed to track down the correct GM belt tensioner to have as a spare, and hopefully a small pile of sale-or-return spares are waiting for me courtesy of the nice man at Arabian Automobiles, the Nissan dealer. The (Chinese) air-horns I installed before the UAQ solo race have died already, so I’ve replaced them with a pair of (Japanese) conventional horns which are equally deafening and seemingly less fragile. (Just don't get me started about the Chinese....)

The annual MOT (or should I say TRA) was also due this week, which meant Sunday was spent surviving the double whammy of a check-over by Rob Bryan at Bin Sulayem Performance, and then by the ‘experts’ at the Tasjeel. The first was no problem, the second – well, let’s just say I eventually got through without completely losing my rag.

That pretty much brings you, dear reader, up to date with the doings at NewTrix. The Phantom Blogger has once again been recruited to spread glad tidings of great joy (or not, as the case may be) on a daily basis during the event, so be sure to keep this blog on your watch list. Why not ‘Join this site’ as a follower? It doesn’t mean you’ll be deluged with spam, only that you’ll get an alert when a post is added to the blog. (Go on, you know you want to…)

Oh, and we're number 223 this year out of a total of 44 entries in the auto class. Go to www.abudhabidesertchallenge.com and you should be able to follow us through their live tracking - Inshallah.

Brief, but pants......

To the relief of many of our readers, today’s rambling monologue will be a little shorter. That’s the good news. The bad news is that the reason for a relatively short blog is that Mr. and Mrs B. suffered an even shorter competitive entry in today’s Special Stage. Because about 10 miles* in to what should have been 200 miles* of desert crossing today, a component part of the Patrol gave up the ghost.

I’ll give you three guesses as to which part. Was it;

A) The PK 2040 EPDM serpentine belt

B) The parabolic accumulatory giblet nubbler

C) The sequential crank angled oojamaflip

If you guessed A) then well done, you’ve been paying attention to the earlier blogs. If you guessed B) or C), you’ve probably just come from a very late night out and are currently feeling a little tired and emotional. Or you work behind the parts counter at Halfords.

After replacing the belt for the umpteenth time, looking to the heavens and quietly uttering the words “Goodness me this is all really rather tiresome”, Ian made the smart decision to return to the bivouac rather than keep driving through the stage and eventually run out of PK 2040 EPDM serpentine belts somewhere beyond the black stump.

The whole team spent the rest of today removing alternators, water pumps power steering pumps etc. from the vehicle, dismantling those as best they could and making sure all the pulleys were free to rotate without binding, and aligned with one another. Thanks to the BMW crew for the loan of the Torx tools and letting Ian have a look over what turns out to be exactly the same alternator used on their race car, to ensure ours was not damaged in any way. And how’s this for service; the very nice Mr. Nadir from Al Ghandi, who supplied the parts yesterday, rang me at mid-day today to check that he’d supplied the correct parts, and to ask how the team were getting on. If he carries on like that, Mr. Nadir will be on next year’s service crew!). Watch your back Rick (not you Rick).

In other news Team Saluki’s day was cut short with fuel issues, Fadi Melky pulled out at the halfway point (problem as yet unknown), Mike Ziegler didn’t start and Malcolm Anderson and Patrick McMurren finally had a decent days desert duning. Well done DuneRaiders. It appears James West didn’t start today – apparently he has an injured hand which is making it painful for him to ride, yet yesterday he was fastest UAE finisher. And a mention too for 21 year old local motocross rider Sam Sunderland, who proved that his stage win on Day 2 was no fluke with another Stage win today. Better watch your back James……

Right I’m signing off from the blog for another year. I am flying to the UK tonight to test drive some fast expensive cars courtesy of those very nice people at Jaguar. Ian will hopefully be updating the blog tomorrow, the final day of the rally. I’d like to thank my agent, PR staff, writers, chauffer and masseuse for their support, which has allowed me to make it through a tough few days. But I can’t because I don’t have them. This phantom blogging pays less than being a service crew member. Eh Rick? (no, not you Rick, the other Rick).

It’s been emotional.

* Miles: What kilometres become when they grow up.